|Sword Art Online|
|The Great Equalizer|
Before I start this tirade on the female characters from Sword Art Online allow me to say that I like this show and would probably kill anyone of you to get my hands on the Virtual Reality Tech called Nerve Gear in the show. Now I don't really pose a threat physically, cause I stand at a astounding 5'6, but you would be surprised how much a Bowie knife levels the playing field. Oops, I got offtrack which might be a recurring theme in my blogs back to the task at hand however.
SAO follows around Kirito it is quickly established that he is an elite player of SAO, this is shown when he teaches some scrub the basics, unfortunately on the first day of the games release the game's creator comes out and says if you don't beat the game or die in the game you will die a horrible death in real life. Kirito, who is a badass, then starts his quest to free all the players from this hell. On this quest he comes across about 3 female characters that can't fucking help themselves.
The first useless female character is Sachi. Her whole deal is that she is afraid of death and just wants to get back to the real world, a normal goal for any character in this show. Sachi is shown to be useless, she is scared of the front lines and can't really handle any real combat to the point that Kirito bails her out numerous times. Eventually Sachi gets the axe do to Kirito's own stupidity, which is not her fault, but if she spent more time leveling up instead of being a goddamn baby maybe she could of fought off those hellspawns and you know....live. Now Sachi's role is that of the scared little girl and it served a purpose, it shaped Kirito in some way, but that doesn't excuse the fact that all she did during her 22 minutes on the show was pout about death, get in the way, and then die a terrible death.
Silica is a beast tamer and dolt. The first time we see her Kirito bails her out of a tight spot. Do you see the theme here? Kirito is a badass and he needs to be the White Knight for every female that crosses his path because they have the same self defense skills as one of those goats that just fall over, you know the one..continuing though. Silica gets her beast partner killed because she lets her pride get in the way, wanting to revive her dead partner she and Kirito head to the Hill Of Memories. When they get there her true incompetence is shown. She gets attacked by every plant monster, they all look like they belong in a hentai, and instead of defending herself she panics thinking that someone might see her panties. Kirito right before all this unfolded states that the monsters are fucking pushovers and there is no real reason to panic. So Silica does the complete opposite and everytime they run into a monster she either A. Panics or B. Kirito comes to her rescue. Silica to my surprise makes it through the episode alive but only because Kirito is there to pull her ass from the fire at every corner.
Lisbeth is the last to be included in this group and honestly she might be my favorite character from the whole well....character standpoint but, much to my dismay, she also can't defend herself. She and Kirito go on a quest to get an ore to make a super duper powerful sword. Kirito, who at this point has come across more helpless bitches than he can count on both hands, offers his assistance in obtaining the ore. Now at this point we only know that Lisbeth is a blacksmith and has no real combat skills so if she couldn't defend herself it would be understandable but then she says something like "I am a high level mace user." Sadly we never get to see this. When confronted with an opponent her main tactic is to become a fucking liability and almost get herself and Kirito killed by falling down a chasm. Yet again Kirito saves the goddamn day and they both make it back to the safety of the blacksmith shop in one piece.
There you have it three female characters from this show that can't help themselves in terms of basic survival skills. I don't know if this was done to show how strong Kirito is, which probably is the case, but it in my opinion this hurt this show. I didn't discuss Asuna here or her fall from badass grace because that would spoil the entire second half of the show (WHICH SUCKS) for people and it makes me sad, real sad. In closing I guess this recurring dilemma in the show was what nerds would like, to be a super powerful guy and save all the damsels but that just doesn't do it for me I guess.
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