Monday, February 25, 2013

I wear Yellow and Blue spandex to work. Bub

   Who here didn't grow up and play X-men? I am not talking video games or with toys I am talking about getting a group of your buddies or family members and just started beating the shit out of the imaginary Sentinels that you pointed to in  your backyard or school yard depending on where ever imaginary  Professor X told you and your team to go and you were either X-men Gold which was the  team of  Colossus Jean Grey, Storm, Bishop, Iceman and Arch Angel or you were X-men Blue which was the team of Cyclops, Gambit, Jubilee, Beast, Rouge and Wolverine.

  It didn't matter if you put on those cheap plastic neon Gordy Le'Forge (This isn't the clip I wanted but still works) it glasses you got at your friends birthday party to pretend you were shooting optic blasts from your face , hung upside down from the monkey bars with out your shoes on quoting the only Shakespeare you know at the age of 9 ( To be or not to be) , grabbing the headless broom handle while throwing playing cards, putting 3 white plastic knifes in between your fingers calling everyone bub , or just using your hands to point at stuff and making sounds with your mouth. The X-men shaped your child hood.  The best part about the X-men is that they related to the outcasts. No matter who you are , you were always accepted by the X-men and I think thats why people my age really took to the X-men because we didn't have something to define our generation. Even though the X-men came out in the 60's we took to it because we are a generation of outcasts. Well it was either X-men or Pepsi Points.

   As a child of the 90's. Look I was born in 85 so I wasn't even a human through out the tail end of the 80's and according to Vh1 I didn't miss too much. But I got to grow up in the hay day of accessible violence, mild cussing, and pixy sticks that where just test tubes of colored sugar. But my point is the X-men cartoon along with Marvels Action hours( Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk , Sliver Surfer, and Fantastic 4) Batman the Animated Series, Spiderman, and Rugrats really locked up the weekend.  Wait this paragraph doesn't make too much sense. Just know that only Batman and Rugrats hold up. Plus Jimmy and I had almost all the X-men figures.

    I just wanted to talk about why I have really no faith in the new X-men movie and I go off and talk about how I used to play like when I a kid/ teenager. But back to my point of the X-men movies, after X2 the next two have sucked ass. X3 and X-men first class were just terrible  lets not mention the poorly guided Wolverine movie that never really answered any questions.  Before you go on the whole " But Bryan Singer is back and he did X-men and X2 . He knows how to direct this type of movie." and to answer you ( really my self because I get the least page views on this team) Bryan Singer stopped being a good director after Superman Returns. Are you telling me that Valkyrie is a good movie or are you going to go see Jack and and the Beanstalk ... I mean Jack the Giant Slayer? The answer is a big old no.

Seriously What the Fuck was this about
    Now with this new X-men movie they are talking about time traveling and First class X-men meeting modern leather clad X-men? So not only do we have to forget that the real X-men first class was Beast , Cyclops, Marvel girl , Iceman and Angel. Not Havoc, Banshee, Mystique, Lenny Kravitz daughter who just spit fire balls out of her mouth like an idiot, and some poor guy who had pretty cool powers gots  blowed up .  Also they want us to forget that Alex Summers is going to meet his grown up brother or are they not going to go deep into their characters backstory unless It's Fassbender , McCoy, and Lawrence  because that where the money is.Having it end with no real reason for why the characters made their choices because they were at a bind for time. What will the new movie tell us though.  Are we going to see the start of the MRDC because Peter Dinklage is might be playing the creator of the Sentinels?How are they going to interact with the future X-men when Sentinels were never really brought into the first 3, are we going to see how young Scott Summers and young Jean Grey met and became the #4 power couple in all of comic books, or are we going to sit for 2 hours following Hugh Jackman  around and then find out in the last 20 minutes that the movie is really about someone else... again.  Who knows all I know is that this movie will be package like it's something we've never seen before and we'll all line up to witness a movie that you'll have a better time debating then actually watching.  They need to stop trying to make these movies live in the real world and just have fun with it. The X-men fans don't want to see leather bound mutants. WE WANT YELLOW AND BLUE SPANDEX!  I know that sounds odd but you know it to be true.

 Well that's that. I'm done and Just like the last two X-men movies. I started out Strong ,got lazy in the middle and finished disappointing the masses.  Now I have to go back to work my boss is giving me the stink eye.

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